She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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