And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize