omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
this will be a night to untag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize