remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
