i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Randomize
