just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Of course I have a pirate flag
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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