I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
