I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
