Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
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