It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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