walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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