Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
