you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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