do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
