so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
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It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
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But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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