belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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