is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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