Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize