There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Randomize
