would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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