There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
