if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Randomize