Just cropdusted the office
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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