and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i just had sex bonerless
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
