with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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