talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
she pinky promised me she was 18
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize