I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
