Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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