My first STD was from a foam party
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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