Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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