Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize