All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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