She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I can't put those talents on a resume
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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