I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
