Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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