so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize
