You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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