I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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