I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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