I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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