All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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