My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
