i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
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