thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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