Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
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Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
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I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
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