She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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