True but thats because hes a fetus.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
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and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
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These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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