I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
