yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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