I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize