I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
