Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
